Farty's Fortunes

Thursday 27 August 2009

World Mourns IRA Backer

The world was in mourning last night for the notorious killer and terrorist fundraiser Edward "Ted" Kennedy, who died after his own revolted body turned against him in disgust.

Best known for the 1969 killing of political campaigner Mary Jo Kopechne at Chappaquiddick, Kennedy was also heavily involved in financing terrorist organisation the Irish Republican Army (IRA), holding innumerable fundraising parties in order to pay for guns, ammunition, training, bomb-making materials, etc.

Sinn Féin mastermind Gerry Adams said, "If it hadn't been for Ted's relentless fundraising activities, we, er, I mean the IRA would have run out of money to buy guns back in the 1970s, but thanks to his help, we, um, they were able to kill British soldiers, policemen and the hated Protestants right through the '80s, '90s and on into the 21st century. For that, terrorists everywhere owe him an undying debt of gratitude."

In 2004, airline agents acting on the advice of the Department of Homeland Security (DHS) attempted to block the known terrorist backer from boarding five separate flights, but on each occasion the silver-tongued killer was able to con officials into believing that he was in fact a respected US Senator and allowed to proceed with his campaign of terror.

Finally, however, Kennedy's own brain turned against him and successfully finished him off on Tuesday, August 25, 2009. He will be missed only by supporters of terrorism.

12 comments:

#Debi said...

One blog I read this morning said that he would be missed and would be hard to replace in the Senate. To that I say, thank God! I did not know about the IRA connection; there were plenty of other reasons not to like him, though.

Mr Farty said...

#Debi - I wish I was making it up, but see this article in the Daily Telegraph.

Liz said...

When the Americans chawp on about the war on terror, they conveniently forget how they supported terrorism in the UK via Noraid all those years.

Mr Farty said...

Liz - LALALALA can't hear y'all!

unmitigated me said...

I'm not boycotting Scotland! And tho' I yam a Democrat, I'm with you on Kennedy. Merkan's have a thing for Kennedys, thinkin' they can do no wrong. They are our royal family. yeesh.

Helena said...

Some of the American blogs I read all say that he's going to be missed but not why. And then I read your blog post (and the Daily Mail article) and actually get an idea of what kind of a man he really was. Thank you, Farty!

Mr Farty said...

MAW - Our own Royal family are, of course, perfect. Except for Phil Spear-chucker. And Charles the tree-hugger. Oh, and Harry the Nazi. Erm, Princess Pushy of Kent...

Helena - The Daily Hate Mail tends to contradict itself, so I'd take anything they say with a pinch of salt. Good place for a strong opinion though, right or wrong.

#Debi said...

I've reposted that article on my FB page...thanks for the link.

Unknown said...

C*NT!

Mr Farty said...

#Debi - You're welcome.

John - Succinct as ever.

Sewmouse said...

I'm certain there were many things about Ted Kennedy to dislike.

I'm certain there were plenty of things about him TO like, or the people of Massachusetts would have not re-elected him over and over.

I didn't personally know Ted Kennedy - and until his death, other than his being JFK's brother and the Chappaquiddic (sp?) thing, I knew little about him or his career.

I'm quite certain he wasn't Saint Teddy as some folks are making him out to have been.

I also am quite certain that he wasn't the devil incarnate.

Even the best of us can make foolish decisions and actions based on misguided ideals.

Hell - I voted for Ronald Reagan once. - QED

Mr Farty said...

Sew - Everyone has their good and bad points. Even Saint Diana.